It has been 3 years I've stopped blogging. Writing my diary ;).Wow.
I am here today writing this post is because of Movement Control Order happened in Malaysia caused by Covid-19 virus spreading around. Thus, I have plenty of time to write out my thought and my life recently. Love writing this because I think I am overloaded with negativity these days, need to distress.
Pass 3 years I have changed my job and get myself in a relationship. Working at hometown as I wished, getting a good boyfriend? Doing great I guess?
Things for me to get in thought:
Staying at home...
It actually making me more dependent and lazy in house chores. Being in a comfortable environment. Work--home--work--home. Making me and my mom getting much argument actually, so I've decided to work--workout--home. Reducing the time at home, reducing the conflict. At the same time, reducing the interaction...not a good idea. I'm sucks in this, trying to be good girl; making me so fake, trying to be nice; get a slap instead. I'm not sure, trying to treat people how I want to be treated. This just doesn't work?
Being in a relationship...
Just got into a relationship after 2 months of knowing each other. Thinking is it a rush? After these years he could make me feel it doesn't matter how long we know each other, he appreciate things I done and he tried very hard to make this relationship works. I am used to be alone before this and it is good that when there is someone keep checking up on you until it has become a routine. Things get worse when I started figured out I am too clingy, keep wanting attention. But is it normal? I don't know. The feeling is just so depressing when he didn't call, he didn't response or missed out the reply, he sometimes or most of the time forget things I wanted him to bring/ to do. Ya, I try to convince myself most of the time he is busy, he need to bear a lot of responsibility. So this kind of cycle repeated, depress--self-convincing--feel better. Of course most of the time I feel being loved, pampered , that I doubt should I actually do something more to pay back his kindness and act of thoughtfulness.
Come through a saying that being a couple, do not argue without purpose, argue for a purpose. So that hit me in my head, what is the thing that we are trying to get after we argue? That applies to everyone not only couple i guess. In work, family, friends... we argue because of the act, the values, the attitude, trying to get the same goal/aim so things achieved happily for both party.
Yah~ That's enough for me to pour out thoughts, let's see how things goes.
kthxbye.
